20 things that Oprah knows...

ok, so while at work, I came across this on Oprah's web site. this is a list of 20 things that Oprah knows for sure. Originally, I started reading it to laugh at what she considered important enough to list as something she knows, but as I read, I realized that a lot of what she said is true and is applicable to us all at any stage of our lives. so here's her list, but in addition to that, I will be making my commentary (and we all know how well that goes sometimes )


1. What you put out comes back all the time, no matter what. (This is my creed.)

Well think about it...isn't it true? think about every relationship in your life, everything you've tried to achieve; the influence and results have generally reflected the time and effort you've put into it. the degree you're studying for, the friend you make time for; all that works for you if you work for it. nothing comes on a silver platter anymore my dears. you need to do the work. And it doesn't only apply to this context; think about the things you say too. You may have an instance when you say something, not realizing how someone else might understand it; it can either have good or bad consequences based on who it is and the situation surrounding you. guys; if you don't want bad things to happen, don't invite them in. THAT simple.

2. You define your own life. Don't let other people write your script.

you ever think someone else is living your life? or that your parents are trying to live through you? i know i have! there's been times as recent as last month, even last week, where i thought i was living someone Else's life and I was walking their path and all that jazz. but was I really? I mean, clearly I existed before I knew of this person, and I'll exist after this person is out of my life, so was I really letting myself be defined by them? (for a few weeks, I honestly was) and guys, if you seriously feel like someone's trying to live through you or that you're being defined by someone else, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. you have control of your own future, no one else.

3. Whatever someone did to you in the past has no power over the present. Only you give it power.

ok, this one is iffy (and those who need to know why do). NEVER, and I mean NEVER, let your past define your present or your future. I know, I know, people say learn from your mistakes (which always happen in the past), but they said LEARN, not let them rule your life and how you live. I know people who ruin a whole bunch of stuff cause they're too blinded by their past to even realize how blessed they really are. oh, and another thing; if your past was troublesome and had bad repercussions, GET IT OUT OF YOUR LIFE. I understand that we're all nice people and ladidadida...but really, if it was bad then, chances are it will be bad again, and again, and again...look it in the face and tell it to go away; and then smile :)

4. When people show you who they are, believe them the first time. (A lesson from Maya Angelou.)

ahh, Miss Angelou. how I love you. but that's besides the point. when someone shows you who they really are, that's who THEY REALLY ARE. don't come up with excuses, don't come up with lies; it won't help. that's the person's core character, and trust me, you had a feeling they were like that before they decided to let you in.

5. Worrying is wasted time. Use the same energy for doing something about whatever worries you.

nuff said. this one's self explanatory.

6. What you believe has more power than what you dream or wish or hope for. You become what you believe.

the strongest thing that an individual can do is believe. it gives us strength in our darkest hours, and provides that little silver lining that everyone talks about and Radha likes to scribble on (I had to go there :P) dreams and wishes, while they are nice, remain just that; dreams and wishes. They never materialize. as long as you believe, you'll make an effort and eventually see results :)

7. If the only prayer you ever say is thank you, that will be enough. (From the German theologian and humanist Meister Eckhart.)

again, self explanatory.

8. The happiness you feel is in direct proportion to the love you give.

ok, this should be the way everyone lives their life. the happiness that anyone of us has felt in our life is in direct relation to the love we give; be it love of another person, love of what we do, love of what we see. there's something about appreciating things that makes us happy, so keep that in mind. If you're ever down and out, think about the things that you really appreciate; that smile will appear in no time.

9. Failure is a signpost to turn you in another direction.

you failed at something? Great! now try the other way and see what happens....

10. If you make a choice that goes against what everyone else thinks, the world will not fall apart.

not to make it sound like people don't matter, but YOUR LIFE IS YOURS TO LIVE. so live it. Don't make a decision based on the fact that you heard something or someone told you not to, or there's just a whole bunch of negativity around it; chance are that what doesn't work for them might work for you. it doesn't mean that they're gonna hate you and you're gonna be alone with nobody in your life; it just means you made a decision for yourself which might not be a popular one. it's not the end.

11. Trust your instincts. Intuition doesn't lie.

we've all dealt with this!! so now this means story time!!!! best things that have happened to be has been because I've trusted my instincts. there are sooooo many times that if I had used logic, or reasoning or anything that generally goes against my intuition, I would not have the moments that I've had or become the person that I have become. and these moments generally become my most cherished moments cause each one of them is special to me and I remember them all the time.

12. Love yourself and then learn to extend that love to others in every encounter.

sounds like my rule of thumb; love someone cause they love you. it's hard to love someone who doesn't care for you or if you don't care for yourself; it's like all this slimy hate that makes you all gross and become someone you don't even recognize. bust yes, first you must love you, and it becomes easier to love someone when they love you in return.

13. Let passion drive your profession.

love what you do and do what you love people!!

14. Find a way to get paid for doing what you love. Then every paycheck will be a bonus.

see above.

15. Love doesn't hurt. It feels really good.

holy Oprah! did you just read the manuscript of my life?!?! so yes, love, in fact does not hurt. it does feel really good. it's like the heat from the sun beating down on you while you're on the beach (i LOVE that feeling), and it makes you smile, all the time. you wanna know which part does hurt? it's when love is removed from you; that just feels like the first snow fall of the winter, it makes my bones hurt. so guys, don't say love hurts and love stinks and all that, cause it's not love. it's the other part.

16. Every day brings a chance to start over.

true. the only time you can't do that is when you let yesterday become your dress rehearsal for today. then you're effed.

17. Being a mother is the hardest job on earth. Women everywhere must declare it so.

hardest but the most rewarding.

18. Doubt means don't. Don't move. Don't answer. Don't rush forward.

doubt is just the devil in another form. doubt is what stops you; and honey, you don't need to be stopped. like i said, live your life!

19. When you don't know what to do, get still. The answer will come.

not too sure what she means, but when i'm confuzzled, i just usually take a step back and look things over; reflecting on things can sometimes help you put things into perspective (this may take more than one try; depends on your mind set. last time it took me about 5 tries and then I realized what i knew from the beginning)

20. "Trouble don't last always." (A line from a Negro spiritual, which calls to mind another favorite: This, too, shall pass.)

they don't. everything gets better. just give it time (now, who else finds it funny that I just put that down?). just stay true to you and you'll see the way.